The Things That Held You Back

Some people may look back and realize that there were several things that held them back. Perhaps those things were the people around them, perhaps their environment, their childhood, their limiting beliefs, etc. and for some, the very thought of these things holding them back keeps holding them back.

The one thing you can never recuperate is time. Once time is gone, it’s gone. However, you still have more time ahead of you. The longer you keep looking back at the things that held you back, the more held back you will be. The things that once held you back don’t need to continue holding you back.

If you are held back for whatever reason, I want you to seriously consider the fact that perhaps it is you who is holding you back. Why do I dare you to consider this? Because the reality is that you can NOT control what others do. You can NOT control how others think. NO ONE has power over you. NO ONE can define you. NO ONE, unless you grant them permission, can do anything in your life.

I want to briefly discuss about childhood and this is one that is difficult to talk about since I know for some there were probably serious childhood issues. Once you become an adult, YOU have the choice as to whether or not you are going to continue to allow what happened to you to affect you. If you realize that the issues are too deep that you can’t handle them alone, then go seek a therapist or a psychologist. Get the help you need but don’t continue to allow your past to affect you in negative ways.

I want to briefly discuss limiting beliefs. It is a must to find the source of the limiting beliefs. You may be surprised to learn that the limiting belief you may have is someone else’s beliefs and you just internalized it as your own belief. It is important to challenge your beliefs if you are to grow into the person that you are meant to be.

I want to briefly discuss your environment. You don’t have to be your environment. If your environment isn’t congruent with the person that you are, that doesn’t mean that who you really are is wrong. Just like not all trees can grow in the same environment, we all can’t grow in the same environment. Know that you are much more than your environment if your environment is not a reflection of you. Also know that just because you are not like your environment, that doesn’t make you wrong. That just means that you are you and that’s it. There is nothing wrong with that.

The last thing I want to briefly discuss is people. What people think or say about you is none of your business. Your business is YOU and that’s it. Once again, you can’t control what other people do. You can’t control how other people think. People can only hold you back if you allow them to hold you back. Also people’s complexes and criticisms are non of your business. What other people decide to do with their life you can not control. The only person you can control is yourself so start to control yourself so that you can have the life that you want.

It is a must to control your thoughts, your emotions, your decisions, your actions and what you allow in your life. Remember that nothing needs to hold you back unless you ALLOW it to hold you back. This is the key word- allow. Remember that you are the only one who can allow things to hold you back.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

How Your Definition of Beauty Ties In With Your Well-being

One may not think that the definition of beauty is very much tied to one’s well-being since when one thinks of well-being/wellness, it is inevitable to think about nutrition and working out. However, this one definition can influence your well-being either for better or for worse. If your definition of beauty is hurting you rather than helping you, then it’s time for you to change your concept of beauty.

Our self-concept and self-esteem are very much tied to the way we feel and think about ourselves physically. It is because of this that your definition of beauty can either hurt you or help you. But first, let’s discuss what being beautiful means.

Beauty comes in all shapes, sizes and colors and thank God for this. It is these differences that make life so interesting. It is these differences that make us all fit with someone or some group. The different spices that we have in our pantry are what keep our food delicious with unique flavors. This is the same thing when it comes to people.

I am also aware that many of us want what we don’t have. Those who have curly hair wish they had straight hair and vice versa. Those who may be short wish they were a bit taller, well that’s not my case because I love my height. What I may lack in height I have in abundance in other things. This is exactly how you have to view whatever it is that you don’t have. Whatever it is that you “lack”, you have in abundance in other ways, whether that be intelligence, charisma, etc.

So with this said, what is your definition of beauty? If your definition of beauty consists of things that you don’t have or lack, then I encourage you to reconsider your definition of beauty because if this continues on, this can greatly affect the way you see yourself. Trust, know and learn to see several things about you that are beautiful. Everyone has their own beauty and this, in and of itself, is beautiful! Beauty doesn’t consist of having straight, long hair, or clear skin or whatever the color of your skin.

One thing I can’t leave out of this post is never, EVER allow anyone to define for you what is beautiful. Never EVER allow anyone to define you. The moment you allow this to happen, you allow that person to take control of the way you view and feel about yourself and that is a big no no.

The definition of beauty….is one to look into if you notice that you don’t find yourself pretty enough or handsome enough or good enough. You are MORE than pretty enough, MORE than handsome enough, MORE than good enough. If you don’t think this way, it’s time for you to check what your definition of beauty is.

You can read this blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

The Importance of Saying “No”

You probably wouldn’t think that this has much to do with your well-being, however, “no” should be a part of your vocabulary in order to increase your well-being and this is what I will be discussing in this week’s post.

There is a Spanish saying that goes “Quien mucho abarca, poco aprieta” which means that if you try to get your arms around too much, you won’t be able to squeeze. In other words, if you try to do so much, you will get none done. There is only so much that anyone can do and the more you want, not only do you have to take breaks and stop for a moment, you have to say “no” to some things that can come your way.

Stress should be reserve for real emergencies- when a family member is ill, when you are ill, when there is an accident, etc.- not for every day stuff of life. Stressing because you are taking up on so much will only lead to illness and to frustration. It will take you out of alignment and won’t help you think straight.

I’ve written this before and I’ll write it again, it’s great to have goals, it’s great to want so much out of life. However, you don’t ever want to take yourself to the point where you break down. That does no good to anyone.

Saying “no” is about setting priorities. In order to achieve much, you need to set priorities first and then once those tasks are completed, move on to the next task. It’s not that certain things are not important to you, it’s just that in order for you to be able to complete that other project successfully, you first must complete the one you have at hand. Also, you must know what would make the most difference now and work on that first. This is another way to get more done- knowing what would make the most difference in your life if that task was completed.

Saying “no” is about setting your own boundaries. You set boundaries for yourself and for others. Your well-being must be a priority, first and foremost, and so when you say “no” to certain things, you are avoiding getting yourself into things that at the end will just drive you mentally crazy because it’s too much to do and physically exhausted because having so much to do does wear the body down.

Make saying “no” a part of your vocabulary. This is about you taking care of yourself, not taking on too much stuff than you can possibly handle at the moment and setting boundaries. Others may have their opinions in regards to your “no” and that’s ok. At the end of the day, it’s how you feel that matters most and you never want to take yourself to the point of a breakdown.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Don’t Use That Crutch

My wish for this new year is for you to start the new year with a bam. It is my wish that you have a great year and have the best well-being ever. However, in order to have this, mentally and emotionally you must be right. It is for this reason that I start of this year by suggesting you not to use that crutch.

Crutches are for when one has an injury and needs to use a crutch in order to lean on to move forward or move anywhere. That is the ONLY time you should be using a crutch. Other than that all you will be doing is making yourself more handicap by continuously using something that you no longer need.

The key phrase in the word “crutch” is to lean on. I emphasize this because that is what we sometimes do in life- we use things or others as crutches in order to move on, making ourselves handicap. I’ve said before and I will continuously say and write that the worse handicap is the one of the mind. I would like to add that another kind of handicap which is just as bad is being emotionally handicapped but this I will reserve for another post. Having things or others as crutches is terribly detrimental to your overall well-being and this is what I will be discussing.

Using others as crutches is detrimental to your mental and emotional well-being. It makes you a slave of that other person by attaching some sort of value to the other person that can sometimes undermine your own value. This can make you not realize your own potential, your own capacity to get certain things done and you hinder yourself from seeing how much power you have. It is also detrimental to the relationship. It hurts the relationship because by using someone as a crutch, you accidentally become like a leech, sucking the life out of the other person. This kind of behavior makes you push others away unintentionally. There needs to be balance in a relationship and in order for there to be a healthy relationship, two people need to be whole. A relationship where one is a crutch means one person is not whole.

Using things as crutches, again, it makes you a slave to those things. Part of achieving a great well-being is not having any attachment to things. The best and healthiest attachment to have is with oneself. Again, just like using someone as a crutch hinders you from seeing your own power, so does using things as crutches. It is important to know that no one can help you move forward if you don’t move forward yourself.

Crutches, the wrong crutches I would like to emphasize, rob you of your power. They hinder you from seeing what you are made up of. They mentally and emotionally make you handicapped. In order to be whole you must release those crutches that you have been holding on to and know that it is YOU who makes your life happen.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez

Are You a Liability to Yourself?

Many times we don’t have the life that we want, we don’t feel as great as we are capable of feeling and we don’t reach our fullest potential not because we are not deserving of all the things that we want but because we are our own liability.

The meaning of liability is something that can cause a disadvantage. So with this said, when you are your own liability, you put yourself in a disadvantage in the sense that you yourself cause your own misfortunes, your own failures, your disappointments, etc.

You are probably wondering “how so?”. Well, there are many ways to be your own liability. You can do this through your own beliefs. If you deep down inside don’t believe you are worthy, don’t think you are enough, don’t think that you are capable, these beliefs hinder you of the very thing that you want. This is something to be dealt with ASAP since not dealing with one’s own beliefs can keep recreating what it is that you don’t want.

You do this through your thoughts, whether these are thoughts about yourself or thoughts about your life. This can kind of be related to your beliefs but with thoughts, think about what it is that you think on a daily basis. Your thoughts do influence your emotions.

You can be your own liability by the things that you allow in your life. What kind of messages are you allowing in? What kind of relationships are you allowing in your life? What kind of environments are you choosing to be a part of? What kind of labels are you allowing? You can truly become what you allow.

What kind of shape are you emotionally? We are driven by our emotions. We make decisions based on our emotions. When emotionally we are not right, we won’t have the capacity to make decisions with clarity. When emotionally we are not right, we open the doors to bad things to come into our life.

When you come to the realization that you are your own liability, it is a must to get help. Sometimes it is hard to do this on our own and that is when it is a must to reach out to someone who can help. This is for your own good as well as the good of your own well-being.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

If You’re a Leech, You’re In Great Need of Yourself

What an odd title. It’s probably not a title that you expect to read when it comes to your well-being but this situation of which I’m going to write about may be a situation that either you may be going through because perhaps you are the leech or you know someone who is like a leech to you or you know someone who is going through this.

First I would like to explain what a leech is if you don’t already know. A leech is a segmented worm that sucks blood. As you can perhaps tell from this description, a leech is someone who basically sucks the life out of you since blood can be considered the life of the body. Usually to consider someone a leech, this person is one who drains the energy of others, they may be in great need of attention, affection or love from others. This person may not necessarily mean to be a “leech” and suck the life out of others but they do so perhaps unknowingly.

How can you know when you are being a leech? You will know if you are sincere enough with yourself and know that you need other people’s approval in order to feel loved. You are constantly looking for the person almost in a smothering way. You will also know because either others will tell you that you are draining them or they will want to be away from you. Please understand that it is nobody’s responsibility to give you the love that you need. That is YOUR responsibility. You are the one responsible for creating a life for yourself, for loving yourself, for caring about yourself and for making yourself happy. Giving this responsibility to others is not fair for others nor for yourself plus it is a burden for others.

What can being a leech show you? This can help provide you with some insight as to how you are neglecting yourself. Self neglect does lead one to want to latch on to others and get from others what they are not giving to  themselves. If you notice this about yourself, stop yourself for a moment and give yourself some alone time. Don’t be afraid of your alone time. Some alone time can be great since it is during this time that you can get to know yourself better. Try to see what your soul is trying to communicate to you. You will be amazed at the areas of your life and of yourself that you have been ignoring.

If you have been a leech and have been annoying, know that many have been in your shoes and you can reverse that. You reverse that with some self-care. There is no other love like the one that you can have for yourself.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

REFUSE!

Refuse! This is a bold word to use but it is a word, a verb, a statement that I think is a must if you want to have great well-being in your life. How so is what I will be discussing in today’s post.

It is just my belief that in today’s society we are being conditioned to think that life is just the way it is- we get sick, it’s just the way it is. We get divorced, it’s just the way it is. We are very tired, it’s just the way it is. Lack of money, it’s just the way it is. Life just is the way it is. Although things do happen in life, I refuse to believe life just is the way it is.

Having the privilege to learn more about our body and nutrition has opened up my eyes so much about many things. Despite the fact that there are times that diseases may “creep in”, your body is just so perfect and I refuse to believe that disease is just a part of life. Refuse to believe that being tired is normal! Refuse to believe that the older you get it’s just normal for your body to have aches and pain! Refuse to believe that the body just deteriorates as you get older! Refuse!

Understanding how complex our mind can be but yet how simple we are at the same time, I do believe it just takes very little for us to either be extremely happy or to be on the other end of that. Yet it seems like there are more and more who are feeling sad or frustrated or even angry with life or with others. When this is the case, it may be tempting to believe that perhaps it’s normal to feel frustrated or angry that maybe it’s just the way life is nowadays. You are designed to have love, be in love and to be surrounded by love. You are designed to be happy even though life may throw challenges in your way but overall you are meant to be happy. Refuse to be depressed! Refuse to having a loveless life! Refuse to feel angry all the time! Refuse to constantly feel stressed! Refuse to live a life that you don’t like!

Oh love! Something we can’t be without and yet when it comes to romantic love, it seems as if it is something complicated at times and hard to find. What is even sad is that what we tend to see in society just feeds this negative notion that one may have in regards to romantic love. When being “rejected”, one may feel tempted to believe that perhaps love is not for them, I know this feeling very well, and this is not so. Rejection is a whole other topic that I will be writing about in a near future. For now once again, refuse to live a loveless life! Refuse to believe that love is not for you! Refuse to allow “rejection” to bring you down! You are meant to be in love and surrounded by love.

Refuse, ah, what a powerful word, verb and statement- one that I encourage you to use in this powerful way if you want to achieve great well-being without being bitter, sad or angry because of what occurs in life.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

What’s In Your Toolbox?

Most of us at home have a toolbox filled with tools that we need when something around the house needs a fixing. There are obvious things that we need to have like a screwdriver, a hammer, some nails, etc. and these are just the essentials. Then there are other things that depending on your house needs you may have that perhaps are not so important but you still have them anyways. Besides this toolbox, there is another toolbox that is so essential to your everyday life that many of us neglect and that is a toolbox that no one should be without because it is the kind that is armed with essentials for dealing with everyday life and that is what I would like to call your Wellness Toolbox.

Ok, that name I just made up but if you think about it, just like there will be things around the house that will need some fixing and things get loose sometimes, you too will need some repairs from the wear and tear of everyday life. This is a toolbox that you may access everyday or perhaps some days but it is essential that you start thinking now about your Wellness Toolbox.

So what does this Wellness Toolbox consist of? It will consist of what you will do or use when you are stressed, foods in the fridge already prepared or in your pantry that you can eat when you feel your body may feel down, rituals that you do on a daily basis to guarantee your inner balance and healthy relationships with great people who love you and understand you.

Stress is not meant to be eliminated from your life. Because of this, it is important to learn to manage stress. If you haven’t done this already, think of things that calm you and make you feel good. It can be anything from yoga to meditation. Anything that relaxes you is what is important. The reason why you want to know ahead of time what these things that relax are is because in time of need you want to have access to these tools.

During this flu and cold season, I make sure to have my soup already prepared. I make a soup that I consider and call my penicillin because it has ingredients that just boost the immune system. I have my healthy snacks ready and handy and I have my multivitamins with me that I take daily to ensure that I take care of my body on a cellular level. Have foods already handy that you know your body needs and keep the foods that don’t provide any nutrition out of your fridge and pantry. Like the saying goes “out of sight, out of mind” so if you stack up on healthy foods, you won’t have any option but to eat healthy foods.

Have rituals that you do on a daily basis to guarantee your inner balance. Why? Because you are a total of what you do on a daily basis. Everything that you do adds up. Make sure that you are incorporating some physical activity. Make sure that you have healthy mental habits. Make sure you take high quality supplements. Make sure you are eating right. There are many other rituals you can incorporate but because I don’t want to make this post too long, I just mention a few.

Last but not least, cultivate healthy relationships with great people who love you and understand you. Why should this be in your Wellness Toolbox? Because your social life is part of your well-being. The people who you surround yourself by play a big role in your overall life and well-being. Being around positive, loving people just adds health into your life. We are social beings and we need to surround ourselves with other people for our mental and emotional well-being, however, make sure they are the right people for you because the wrong people can just be disastrous to your life.

If you haven’t yet, make sure to create your Wellness Toolbox now. Just like you have a physical toolbox in case something needs a fixing around the house, there are times when our body may need some “fixing”. Just like your physical house needs maintenance, your body needs maintenance as well and you provide it by having a Wellness Toolbox that you can access when you need it.

You can read this blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

You Need to Make Room For Everything

I wrote a post last year about what does it mean to be a positive person and I wrote that being a positive person doesn’t mean that you are always happy and that you just ignore everything that is going on. What I didn’t mention is that truly positive people are the ones who make room in their life for everything, the good and the bad. Making room for everything is so beneficial for your overall well-being and this is what today’s post is about.

Depending on the kind of person that you are or depending on how you have managed to resolve any issues that were unresolved issues in the past, it may be easy to make room for the good things in life. The reason why I started the sentence with “depending on the kind of person that you are or depending on how you have managed to resolve any issues that were unresolved issues in the past” is because believe it or not, there are those who don’t make enough room for the good things in life and this is not healthy. When this is the case, this may indicate that you have a fear of success which needs to be addressed as soon as possible since this is a hindrance to your happiness and well-being.

Likewise, you need to make room for the “bad” stuff as well. What do I mean with this? Whenever you feel sad or angry, make room for these feelings. Don’t hide them nor deny them. Allow yourself room to feel this way, what you can’t do is sit with this feeling for too long. You need to make room for the “bad” stuff because when you don’t, it just boils inside you like a volcano and it’s just a matter of time for that volcano to erupt. Instead, when you make room for this, you are releasing these energies in a healthy way by tending to them, by paying attention to them, by understanding them. I’ve wrote this before and I will write it again, there is power in understanding your feelings. There is also power in making room for these feelings.

How do you make room for everything? When it comes to the “bad” stuff, (and I write “bad” in quotation marks because these things don’t necessarily need to be bad), make some time to feel these emotions. So if you’re feeling sad, set some time to feel that sadness. Cry if you have to but once that time is up, that’s it. That way you can release those emotions rather than hang on to them. Understand those emotions. Emotions provide feedback as to where you currently are in your life, what you need and what you should be doing. After you understand your emotions then do something about what you are feeling. Whatever it is that makes you feel that “negative” emotion, then it’s best to stop doing it. Do things instead that will make you happy. Pay attention to the feedback and act accordingly.

Make also room for the good stuff. Make sure you get your daily dose of happiness. You need to make room for all the good stuff in life. After all, you deserve the good stuff. Make sure you do things that makes your soul beam with joy. Make sure you surround yourself with love and loving people. Make sure you allow yourself to be successful in love, in money, in everything. There are times that we don’t realize that we hinder these things from us.

Part of well-being is also making room for everything in life. It is the making room for everything that allows us to learn and grow from our experiences and makes us appreciate certain things better. It also allows us to have a better understanding of ourselves and others.

You can read this blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Make Your Own Vows

Today, the day after my birthday, I had a voice inside me advice me of certain things which I know was my intuition and it’s something that I would like to share with you. I feel like sharing this because I think these things that my intuition is advising me are things that we should all be doing on a daily bass. Here it goes…

“Aura, from this day forward, I want you to make several vows because life is too beautiful and awfully short to be focusing on all the things that are not serving you. I want you to make a vow to focus more on yourself. Do more of the things that make you happy. Focus on making yourself happy because that is your main responsibility. Take care of your health no matter what. Focus on those who truly love you and forget those who couldn’t see your value. Let go of those who hurt you and love more those who love you. Let go of your fears. You can’t live on fear since fear paralyzes you. Be more of who you are. And since your relationships mean so much to you, again, let go of those who can’t see your value and focus and love those who do. Make this promise to yourself, please.”

This is the kind of vow that we all need to make to ourselves. To your vows you can add whatever it is that you know you need to work on more in your life. We make vows to our spouse and loved ones but many times we may fail to make that vow to ourselves. I personally know what it’s like to struggle with certain issues and I can tell you that not learning how to deal with them can hinder you from your best. I know what it is like to allow your fear to take over. This stops you from fully growing. I also know what it is like to focus on the wrong things and people. Those that are meant to be in your life will have the capacity to see you exactly for who you are and still stay in your life.

I share this with you because I want to challenge you to make your own vows and to commit to them because committing to your own vows can add tremendously to your well-being. Well-being doesn’t start with anything or anybody else. It starts with you.

You can read this blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.