Comparisons Hurt You

In today’s post, I would like to encourage you not to do comparisons- don’t compare yourself to others nor compare yourself to who you were a few years ago- and will explain why.

First off, everyone’s journey is unique. We all are different and we came here for different reasons and with different things to contribute to this world. Because of this beauty of all of us being unique, it kills our well-being to be comparing ourselves to others.

Comparing yourself to others is like driving and rather than looking ahead, you are looking to the side out the window for a really long time. What happens if you drive this way? You’re going to crash and hurt yourself badly. God forbid the crash can even be deadly. Well, same thing can happen when you constantly compare yourself to others and rather than looking at your own journey, you are looking at what someone else is doing, how they are succeeding, etc. You miss all the goodness there is to your life and you can crash and hurt yourself badly because you are not looking ahead.

Comparing yourself to others is very distracting. It distracts you by fooling you into thinking that you are not where you are supposed to be. It distracts you from looking at all the lessons that you have to learn from your own experiences. It distracts you from seeing your own beauty, your own uniqueness, and it distracts you from what the universe has for you.

Comparing yourself to others can block you. It blocks your own flow which is unique to only you. How so? Well, if you are seeing how well someone else is doing and you would like something similar for yourself, perhaps you are meant for something similar but not in the same manner that they went about it. If you are looking at how others do things, you may be fooled into thinking that you must do things exactly the way they do it in order for you to experience something similar. What if things are supposed to turn out even better for you? What if there is a different, more fun way that aligns to how your true essence is? You won’t know any of this if you keep comparing yourself to others.

You can’t even compare yourself to where or how you were a few years ago. This can be very bad if you are not aware of this. My dad passed away, this year it will be three years ago since he passed away. During these past two years, I gained some weight. For a minute, I was being hard on myself for allowing myself to gain the weight because I worked so hard for so long to have the body that I had. That’s when I needed to stop myself from comparing myself to who I was even 4 years ago. Things back then was different and I needed to understand that I was now in a grieving moment; in a moment where I had to deal with several emotions and changes that if that is not dealt with properly, then it will manifest itself in other ways, in my case, it was weight gain.

Because I stopped comparing myself to the old me, I am happy to share that I have been able to pick up from where I was before and I have been losing weight. But this time it’s different because I truly am appreciating this journey and dealing more with my emotions of losing my dad. This is why comparisons can be so harmful because as human beings, we are always evolving and it’s important to take notice of that and accept it.

If you have been finding yourself in that trap of comparing yourself to others or even to who you once were, I would like to invite you, for the sake of your own well-being, to stop that at once. Know that you are beautifully and wonderfully made. You don’t have to compare yourself to anyone. The reality is that there is no comparison. There is none. You are you and there is no one like you.

I also would like to invite you to take the FREE course I created called The Path to Your Nirvana™, which is a 28 day course with 5 steps meant to help you live your own happiness by understanding first what is getting in the way of you being on your own path of happiness, how to overcome it, learning to understand your actions and focus and getting you to the path that your true essence has in store for you. There is a free bonus course with this course so it’s something for you to take advantage of. All you have to do is click on the link https://bit.ly/2QbBZW4, put your name, email address and select which language you would like the course.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.
You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg
And if you would like to bring even more nature into your home, you can do what I do when I need a pick-me-up o when I have a headache, etc. and use the following oils that help me have more balance in life and I’m sure it will help you as well. http://my.doterra.com/Auraemartinez. You can also contact me so that I can help you choose the oils that will best help you.

What Does Loving Someone Else Mean?

Ahhh love. It’s such a powerful word because of all that it implies. It’s also a word/feeling that is so often misunderstood since we all have our own definition of what love is. However, today’s post is not about defining the word but rather about writing what does loving someone else mean.

What does loving someone else have to do with your own well-being? Everything! Believe it or not, your well-being has so much to do with how you love someone else. So what does it mean to love someone else? Loving someone else, first and foremost, entails you love yourself FIRST. It means that you care about yourself FIRST. Believe it or not, loving someone else means you first have to be selfish.

Please allow me to elaborate on this. A healthy dose of selfishness is so crucial to loving someone else. When all you do is give, give and give without filling yourself up first, you will eventually be empty inside. When you are empty inside, you have nothing else to give. When you have nothing else to give, all you are going to want is to receive. Wanting only to receive makes you unappealing energetically, making others not want to be around you.

Giving to others is beautiful but it is a must to remember that with the same intensity that you give to others, you must also give to yourself that same way. When you do, that’s when you will feel full. That’s when you don’t mind giving to others. That’s when you will be able to come from a place of sincere and genuine happiness. It is when you come from a place of genuine happiness when you can give pure love to others.

Loving someone means you do you FIRST. You first take care of your needs so that you can take care of other people’s need next. It means you put your well-being first, making sure that you are happy, making sure you are more than full so that you can share with others what you have.

Loving someone else means you are able to connect with yourself first. Before you can connect with someone else and even to be able to connect with someone else, the connection first must reside within you. When you are not connected with who you are, what you are all about, how you function, what works for you and what doesn’t work for you, there is no way you are able to connect with someone else. There is just no way. This is because when you are not connected with yourself, you have no idea of your needs and wants so you are unable to satisfy yourself first. This is when you may fall in the trap of wanting someone else to fulfill your needs and when others fail to do so, you may try extra hard to get that person to fulfill this need. In this case, it becomes a negative cycle that only feeds any negative feelings you may have.

As you can read, loving someone else does not mean that you are self-sacrificing, extremely loving, extreme giving to the point of you not having much left for yourself or anything that hurts your overall well-being. Loving someone else first means you love you, you love you despite anything and everything. It means you put yourself first because as you do, you take care of your needs which will enable you to be able to take care of other people’s needs. Love first comes from you. It comes from you taking care of you, loving you and respecting you. When you do this, you will be able to offer others a healthy kind of love which is very much needed in today’s world.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

What Are Your Thoughts and Feelings In the Morning and at Night?

Thoughts and feelings are very important to keep in mind when it comes to your well-being because thoughts become beliefs and your beliefs can become actions and a way of life. Your way of life influences greatly your well-being since it does create a domino effect on everything. Your feelings affect the choices that you make in everything whether that is food, relationship, etc.

One thing that I would like to encourage you to think about and analyze is what are your thoughts and feelings in the morning and at night. Why? Because what you last think about or feel before you go to sleep you will most likely think of and feel in the morning and the morning sets the tone for the day. You don’t want to wake up on the wrong side of the bed. You want and need to wake up on the right side of the bed and who determines that right side? You do!

It can be easy to focus on the things that go wrong. Trust me, I know. It can be easy to focus on the things that we yet don’t have. Trust me, I know. It’s easy to have the thought that others are lucky except for us. That thought is harmful to you in so many ways. It can be easy to be impatient to have and be the things we want to have and be. Trust me on this one that I know the feeling. However, all these things will contribute to you thinking the wrong things, feeling the wrong things which can spill over to the next day if your thoughts and feelings are not changed.

I would like to clarify that it is perfectly normal to feel frustrated, mad and disappointed every once in a while. You’re only human. It’s when these feelings are constant that it becomes a real problem because it interferes with your own happiness and well-being. As my mentor Kay Zulu has suggested, when you feel a certain way, move up to the next feeling above that. For instance, if you’re sad, move on to anger because anger is a higher vibration than sadness. Then from anger to being neutral, etc. You can’t jump from being sad to happy, we can’t necessarily do that quickly.

Another thing that I would recommend is that at night you write down and remind yourself all the things that you have to be grateful for. Our mind tends to just wander around and so it’s important to help it focus on the things that we want it to focus on. We do that by redirecting our thoughts at night to the things that we have to be grateful for. This, then, will help you fall asleep in peace and when you wake up, you can feel differently in comparison to feeling sad or angry.

Remind yourself that everything passes so whatever you’re going through, that too shall pass. It’s easy to think that whatever we are going through has no end but it will have an end. Remind yourself of that and do your best to get all the lessons you are meant to learn from what you are currently experiencing. This leads to growth and growth is very much a part of well-being.

I would like to encourage you to be mindful of your thoughts and feelings at night and in the morning. The night time is a time when your body is relaxing and rejuvenating and you need it to rejuvenate in good thoughts and feelings so you can vibrate in high energy. What you last thought of and felt when you went to sleep you will most likely wake up with that same thought and feeling. The morning time sets the tone for the day. If you want a great day, then start your morning right in every regards. Paying mind to your thoughts and feelings at night and in the morning will help you increase in well-being.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

You First Need to Be Right With You

I have written and said over and over the things that I am about to write in today’s blog post. Before anything can be right in your life, whether that’s in relationships, especially relationships, job, anything you name it, you first need to be right with you.

Absolutely everything starts with you. Everything is determined by you. You are constantly sending energy that you may not be aware of that affects the way you interact with others. If you want to feel great most of the time, if you don’t want things to affect you negatively, if you want to come from a place where you are authentic, then you first need to be right with you.

What does it mean to be right with you? This means that you are mostly comfortable in your own skin. This means that you are pretty much accepting of who you are, the way you are. It means that you have a strong sense of who you are- of your likes, dislikes, what you can tolerate and what you can’t, etc. It also means that you come from a place where you are not so judgmental of yourself. It means that you have clarity of who you are and where you want to be. You have a strong sense of direction of your life. It also means that you clear the air in your life as to what may be hindering you from being centered and from your growth. Anything and everything that disturbs your peace you do away because you know it doesn’t serve you.

Everything that I just wrote may sound easier said than done but it must be done. For all these to be done, it is a must to have an assessment of your life. Without that assessment, you won’t know what it is that is clouding your life. You won’t know and fully understand why it is that you feel frustrated, why you don’t manifest the things you want in life, etc. It is the knowing that can help you find a solution to what it is that you need to do in life.

Give yourself time to be right with you. Give yourself the space to connect with yourself. Give yourself the privilege of your time, your attention, your love, your own moment to understand you so that you can be right with yourself. The time that you dedicate to yourself, your own attention that you give to yourself, all this and more you deserve. It is not only others who are deserving of your own time, attention and affection. You also need that from yourself. It is only when you give that to yourself that you will be able to be right with you.

Being right with you is so crucial because it is truly the only way to be happy. Nobody else can really help you be right with you, nor should you give that responsibility to someone else. Besides, giving this responsibility to someone else endangers your well-being in every way because you then become a slave to that other person. A slave of what they may think of you. A slave to the way they react toward you. A slave to their affection and the list goes on.

I would like to encourage you to figure out what is it that makes you feel right with you. Is it space? Is it being alone? Is it being in nature? The more you understand yourself, the more balanced you will feel. You will be able to fill yourself up in a way that no one else can. You will know what your needs are. Ask yourself, who is the fabulous person hidden inside you? You may be surprised to learn how amazing you are.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

Honesty Is Truly the Best Policy

Probably as you read this title, you thought about being honest with others. Even though it is important to be honest with others, this is not the honesty that I am referring to. There is one person that is very important in your life; one person who truly has so much power in your life, one person whom you ALWAYS need to be honest with so that you can be guided to the things and people that you want and that person is YOU.

Yes, the first person that you must be honest with is yourself. Honesty is truly the best policy and it only hurts you to not be honest with your own self. How does not being honest with yourself hurts you? The lack of honesty toward yourself hurts your chances of ever being happy. This is because you will most likely do things that doesn’t come from your true essence which is your soul. Most likely you will do things to please others. Most likely you will seek approval from others. This lack of honesty can prevent you from even listening to your own intuition. This, then, leads you to situations and people that you can’t help but wonder “how did this ever happen?”.

Lack of honesty toward yourself leads you to being confused and lost. This is because if you are not truly honest with yourself, how do you know what you need out of things and people? How do you know what will truly make you happy? How do you know what truly works for you and what doesn’t? What honesty does is that it leads you to the root of things that help you get what you want out of life.

Lack of honesty makes you numb to your own inner truth. How are you supposed to know who you are if you can’t be honest with yourself? Even though there are universal truths, I believe that each of us have our own truth according to our true essence. This truth may not resonate with those around you or even your own environment but how are you supposed to know that when you are not honest with yourself? Honesty sheds light to any darkness that you may be experiencing in your life.

Lack of honesty ruins your chances of ever having the life that you want in every regards. This is because that lack of honesty prevents you from having a deep understanding of who you are. Perhaps you are doing things just because everyone else around you are doing it, but is it really what you want to do? Perhaps you have been so used to eating a certain way because that’s how you grew up eating, but is that way of eating working for you? Perhaps the career that you have doesn’t bring joy to you, so why is it that you are in that profession? Once again, honesty sheds light where there is darkness. If you are in the dark of who you really are, this will hurt your well-being tremendously.

So with this post, I want to encourage you to be honest with yourself as to the decisions that you make, the things that you allow in your life and even the things that you got rid of in your life. Be honest with yourself as to the things that you really want. Be honest with yourself as to how you really want to feel…..because honesty is truly the best policy.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

The Grass Is Never Greener On the Other Side

I think as human beings it’s only normal to think that perhaps others have it better than us, that perhaps we can find someone better than the one we are currently seeing, etc. This kind of thinking although it may be natural to feel, it can prevent you from seeing all the good that is front of you. It is because of this that I would like to encourage you to see that the grass is never greener on the other side.

Don’t wait until something is lost for you to start valuing it. Remember that you currently have things that others would like to have. That may be the job that you have someone else may want. That can also be the relationship that you are currently in someone else would like to have a relationship like yours. Perhaps even a physical quality of yours someone else may want to have. Whatever it is, remember that you have something that someone else may want.

Also, your grass is as green as you make it. Perhaps other people’s grass looks greener because they are taking care of their own grass. So with this said, start taking care of what you currently have. Whatever it is that you see others have, why don’t you try your best to have that as well but just in a way that it’s unique to you. Start taking the steps necessary so that you can have the things that you want, the life that you want, the relationships that you want, the job that you want, etc.

I would like to encourage you to start seeing the wonderful things that you have in your life. Ask yourself: What can I be grateful for today? What do I have that is just great? What are some things about myself that are amazing? How can I improve the relationship I’m currently in? What are the aspects of this relationship that I love? What are some things that make my job great?

Asking yourself these questions will get your brain thinking and moving toward a more positive direction. Remember that your grass will be as green as you make it to be. Do your best to tend to your grass. Take care of it in every season so that it can look its best. Remember that in every aspect of your life, what you put in is what you get out. If you want your life to be as great as you want it to be, that is up to you to do the work that it takes. You have the power to make your grass as green as you want it to be and remember that just because other people’s grass is very green, doesn’t mean that it is greater and better than yours.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

Get a Good Understanding of Who You Are

I am more and more convinced that absolutely nothing can be obtained if you first don’t have a good understanding of who you are. Your overall well-being depends on it and that’s what today’s post will be about.

Understanding who you are is crucial because that is the foundation. Without this understanding, you can’t possibly know who are the right people for you, the right friends for you, the right companion for you, the right career path, anything. It is this deep understanding that leads to breakthroughs in life, that leads to you attracting what you want and need and that leads to a fulfilling life.

So how can you get a better understanding of yourself? You do this by spending time with yourself. That’s right! You need some alone time with just yourself and nothing else influencing you. It is this time spent alone that will help you sit still with yourself so that you can connect with your inner self. It is crucial that you connect with your inner self because it is the only way to access your path.

Pay attention to the way you feel. Your emotions are feedback from yourself. They guide you and let you know where you are in life, what to avoid or do less of, what works for you and what doesn’t, etc. How do you feel when you are around certain people? This is not something to ignore, you have to pay attention to this. This will guide you as to the kinds of people you want and need in your life. How does the idea of having something or doing something feels like? This too is to pay attention to because this clues you in as to what you should consider doing.

Look back at your childhood. What were the things that you were passionate about then? Kids certainly know how to live life because they are grounded and they live in the present moment. They enjoy life and care about being happy. What were some of the things that made you happy as a child? These things will clue you in as to what you need to be doing more of.

Pay attention to your frustrations. That’s right. Your frustrations are key to understanding the kind of life that you need. I wrote an article about it for The Ziet that you can read https://the-ziet.com/2015/12/05/use-frustration-to-gain-happiness-the-benefits-of-frustration-and-how-this-leads-to-happiness/ and this is the link for you to click. Frustration is something to be embraced because without this, you wouldn’t know what to do less of.

Understand what your needs are. I discuss this in my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve because this is one key to getting your life together. Without knowing what your needs are, how are you supposed to have the life that you want?! There is no way around it.

Not knowing who you are is detrimental to your overall well-being and leads to unnecessary hurt and disappointments. It leads to all this because you will attract things and people that sooner or later you realize they are not for you. You end up wondering what happened and a lot of times, what happened was not having a good understanding of who you are to know what you can handle, what you can tolerate, etc. So if you haven’t taken the time to get to know yourself better, please do so. It is for your greater well-being as well as those around you because if you are happy, you have more happiness to offer to others.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

You Are the Fashion!

I am impressed to see what is in fashion when it comes to image. It seems as if we are taught to accept things that are not a part of us. I was impressed to learn that freckles are now in fashion, so much so that people are willing to paint freckles on themselves. I have freckles on my face, not a lot, but some that are noticeable and I remember that as a young girl, I wasn’t happy about my freckles. Now I love them but back then no.

In today’s post, I would like to encourage you for your well-being to embrace the fact that you are the fashion. The way that you are created is exactly the way you are supposed to be and that no one, not even someone with so much influence, has the right to dictate to you what is hot and what is not. Remember that YOU are HOT just the way you are. It’s not the big butt, the small butt, the tone butt, the straight hair, the curly hair, the long hair, the short hair, the one with freckles, none of this is in fashion. Whatever you are, however way you are, YOU ARE IN FASHION.

Why drill this in your mind? Because it is important to have self-acceptance. Self-acceptance is key to great well-being. It is a must to feel great just the way you are. It is important to see how sexy you are no matter how you look. It is important to know your value as a person. It is important to know that you are beautiful just the way you are.

It is also important to ignore the outside messages when it comes to the way you look. Society may say that because your hair is a certain way, because your body looks a certain way, you are not acceptable or good enough. You may be in an environment where people don’t look like you or act like you so you feel like an odd ball. All this can cause havoc on your self-esteem and self-concept that can affect your well-being. Please know that you are the way you are, you have the tastes that you have, you look the way you do for a beautiful reason and purpose. You are wonderful just the way you are. You are handsome/gorgeous just the way you are. You don’t need to be a certain height, a certain weight, a certain nothing to be great. You are ENOUGH just the way you are!

Please remember that YOU ARE THE FASHION. YOU ARE IN FASHION and will ALWAYS be in fashion. It’s important to remember your value and not listen to outside voices nor other people’s opinion of what is right and what is not. Your well-being depends on this.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Choose People Willing to Do the Inner Work

In today’s post, I want to discuss the importance of choosing people willing to do the inner work.

Healthy relationships start with you. When I write the word “relationships”, I mean any close interaction you have with another human being so this includes friendships, family members, and romantic relationships. How and why does a healthy relationship start with you? Because first you have to be right with you. You have to love yourself. You have to love life. You have to see your own potential. You have to see your own beauty. You have to see your own value. You need to be willing to do your inner work. Once all this is in place, then you choose based on that.

So say for example, if you don’t have a healthy relationship with yourself, without realizing it, you most likely will choose people that they are unhealthy themselves. A person with an unhealthy relationship with themselves won’t be able to choose people that are right for them either because deep down inside they don’t feel deserving of healthy love, etc. When you have a healthy relationship with yourself, you are quick to notice when something isn’t right for you and you let it go. This is why it is crucial that you are right with you first.

Just as it is important that you do your inner work, it is important that you choose people willing to do the inner work themselves. This is because people who are not right with themselves don’t have much to offer. We can only offer what we have. So someone who is afraid to make certain decisions and is afraid of happiness will only give fear to you. This means that if you try to engage in a relationship with them, they will confuse you to death because their actions will be that they will push you away or do something that turns you off, etc.

It is only when you are clear in who you are, what you want, on your value and what you deserve that you will get what you want and more. It is then when you can engage in healthy relationships with others, when you can feel great about your life, then attracting more great things into your life and have more to offer to others.

You can tell when someone is willing to do the inner work. How can you tell? Well, let me start off by stating the signs of someone not willing to do the inner work. The first sign is that they live in fear. They are afraid to be happy so they push people away. They have commitment issues that they are not willing to resolve. They are very judgmental of others for silly things. They always find fault in others. They choose to be in relationships or situations that don’t make them happy. They constantly talk about problems. You feel heaviness the moment you are with them. The list can go on. The point is that you end up wondering what happened, is there something wrong with you, your energy shifts for the worse and so on. None of this is good!

Doing the inner work requires one to be willing to look within themselves and work through any issues they may have. It requires one to challenge their limiting beliefs. It requires seeking help should one need help. It requires to notice the patterns in the choices one makes and then be willing to take responsibility for the role they played. Doing the inner work is not easy because of all the emotions that will resurface but it is necessary in order to uncover the things that are holding you back.

Be willing to choose people who are willing to do the inner work because doing so will lead to healthy relationships in which you yourself can blossom as a person. Because you deserve to be loved exactly for who you are; because you deserve to be fully happy; because you deserve a great life, you need to be the first one to be willing to do the inner work so you can then choose someone willing to do the same. You owe this to yourself.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

You Are Where You Are Because That’s Where You Want to Be

Today’s post may be a hard one to digest for many. I know it has been and sometimes still is for me. Today’s post is about how you are where you are because that’s where you want to be.

Why can this be a hard one to digest for many? Because many times it is hard to admit that the reason why we are where we are in life is because that’s where we chose to be. “But Aura, this life that I’m currently living is not what I chose for myself?! All these things just happened to me!” Well, some situations may have occurred but in order for your life to change, in order for you to increase in well-being, it is a must to take responsibility for your life. Just like I’ve mentioned in my speeches, not doing so is like sitting on the passenger seat watching your whole life go by while allowing something or someone else to determine how your life will be. This is why in the book, Creating a Lifetime of Wellness, I encourage readers to take responsibility of their life.

Think about this for a moment, you are making choices every single day. Whether you like your choices or not is a different story but you indeed are making choices that all either add or delete from your well-being. The relationships that you have or the lack of relationships….your choice. The job or career you have…your choice. Your health…your choice. And even if you are predisposed to certain illnesses, and this will be another topic because I do believe that we are not our genes, it is your choice to decide how you will be health-wise. Everything is a choice!

So if you find yourself in a relationship you are not happy with, you are where you are because that’s where you want to be. If you find yourself that you are not happy with your health, remember that you have a choice as to what to do with your health and you can decide if you want to be healthy or not. Believe it or not, most of the things that you have and where you are, you are where you are because that’s exactly where you want to be.

If for whatever reason you are not happy where you are at the moment, then you seriously need to question why you are not happy. What needs to happen in order for things to be different? What can you do now to change your current situation? What actions do you need to take in order for things to flow the way you want them to flow? What do you want out of life?

Remember that you are the one in control of your life and of what you have. You have what you have because that’s what you want to have. You are where you are because that’s where you want to be. Complaining doesn’t serve unless if it is just to let out of your chest what you feel but this doesn’t change anything. What changes things is taking action. So if you want and need things to be different, then you must take action.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.