Look Forward to New Memories….

I’ve had some people wanting me to post about grief, especially since I lost my dad back in May of 2016. Those who know me well, knew some of the hard times I’ve had. Somehow at this time it is difficult for me to write about grief because I am still grieving my dad. Nonetheless, grief doesn’t only apply to when we lose a loved one to death, one can grief the ending of many things like the ending of a job that one love, the end of a relationship, the end of a friendship, and the list goes on. So how does one deal with these kinds of grief that I just discussed? Although I think no one and nothing is replaceable, I think the best remedy is to allow yourself to feel the emotions you feel, go through the grieving process but always look forward to new memories.

We as human beings have a need to belong, feel needed and of connection. This is because this provides us with some sense of purpose. We need purpose because that is what gives our life meaning. Without purpose, life just feels meaningless and life is not meaningless at all.

Grief is a process that we all will go through at some point of our life and we all go through it in different ways. For two years, a part of me was in denial of my dad’s passing, and mind you, I was there when he passed away. Denial is one of the stages to grieving. Then it hit me on year 2 of his passing that he is actually physically gone. During the two years that I was in denial, I did gain weight. I gained weight because a big part of me didn’t want to feel the emotions I was feeling. This is a big mistake.

Not wanting to feel your emotions is a big mistake because all these emotions will find an outlet somehow. That outlet can be alcohol to numb your emotions, overeating or not eating much, smoking, shopping excessively, among many other things that can mask your emotions.

In any kind of loss that you may have, it’s important to allow yourself to go through the stages that you have to go through and feel your emotions. Know that life goes through different seasons. With any kind of loss, it’s important to allow things to flow. Allow yourself to process what happened. Allow yourself to feel the impact of this loss. Allow yourself to experience the stage of grief however way it needs to go through. But, if you notice that you are hitting rock bottom, please seek help. Know that you are not alone. And remember one very important thing, it’s important that no matter the loss, know that you have new memories to look forward to.

If you are going through a divorce, know that you have even more beautiful memories to experience because the person that is for you has yet to arrive. If someone who you thought was your friend for many years all of a sudden that friendship is broken, know that you have even more beautiful memories to experience with other people who have yet to arrive in your life. You lost a job that you so care about, know that you have even more beautiful memories to look forward to since a bigger and better door has yet to open. You lost a person you care about because they passed away, you still have beautiful memories to look forward to, even if that person will no longer be a part of those new memories.

The reason why you want to remind yourself that you have new memories to look forward to is because when we remain in the thought of what is lost, that can set us back even more, contributing to us hitting rock bottom. Grieving a loss is only natural. That is not something for you to avoid or force yourself not to go through. But what you don’t want to do is remain in the feelings and thoughts of that loss for too long to the point where that is your only focus point.

For as hard as it may be to accept, it is important to always keep in the back of our mind that nothing is forever, not even we are forever. This is the reason why we need to enjoy the present time we have, make the most of it, and know that there are new memories to look forward to always. This mentality is what will allow you to be resilient during very hard times. Wherever the mind goes, the body will follow.

So with today’s post, I want to encourage you if you find yourself feeling very low due to a loss, please remember that you have new memories to look forward to. I dedicate today’s post to my mother who is sadden by my dad’s passing since they have known each other since they were 11 years old. This is because I want her to remember that she still has new memories to look forward to, even if my dad is no longer in those new memories.

I would like to invite you to take the FREE course I created called The Path to Your Nirvana™, which is a 28 day course with 5 steps meant to help you live your own happiness by understanding first what is getting in the way of you being on your own path of happiness, how to overcome it, learning to understand your actions and focus and getting you to the path that your true essence has in store for you. There is a free bonus course with this course so it’s something for you to take advantage of. All you have to do is click on the link https://bit.ly/2uDS9Oo, put your name and email address.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

And if you would like to bring even more nature into your home, you can do what I do when I need a pick-me-up o when I have a headache, etc. and use the following oils that help me have more balance in life and I’m sure it will help you as well. http://my.doterra.com/Auraemartinez. You can also contact me so that I can help you choose the oils that will best help you.

 

 

 

 

Be Thankful for Hurtful Situations

Still today my most popular blog post is “Why Do Good People Get the Short End of the Stick?” and this only indicates to me that there are many who are hurt. We are conditioned to numb hurtful situations either through drugs, medications or any other addiction. The truth is that for as long as you ignore the root cause of the hurt, the wound will be there. If for so long you have been putting a band-aid on a big wound, this blog post may be for you. If you constantly find yourself recreating the same situation over and over again, this blog post may be for you. It is precisely for these reasons that you must be thankful for hurtful situations.

I would like to make something clear. I am not implying to allow hurtful situations. I am not implying that you be always happy for the hurtful situations. However, when you can learn to see the value in whatever hurtful situation you are placed, you allow yourself to become a better person because of it and that’s when you will be able to be thankful for the hurtful situations.

Unfortunately we learn more from the painful situations than we do from the good experiences. As a friend of mine, Kay, always reminds me, it’s important to see the lesson. The reason why it is important to be thankful for hurtful situations is because there are lessons to learn. One of the biggest lessons being that most likely there are issues within you that are still unresolved.

It is important to realize not just with our mind but with our heart as well that we are all meant for abundance, healthy relationships, genuine love and all that our heart desires but unless we are willing to do the inner work that it takes, we will continue recreating the same experiences over and over again.

It is a must to recognize patterns in your life. These patterns are gifts from the universe so that we can know that there are things that we need to work on. Once again, unless we are willing to do the work that it takes, we will continue experiencing the same patterns over and over again.

Most of the time we allow hurtful situations to question our self-worth when what we need to question is not our value but our own self-esteem. Remember, the situations and relationships that we allow in our life are in direct proportion to the way we view and feel about ourselves. In other words, we allow things that fit how we feel and view ourselves, as hard as that may be to believe. This took me a long time to fully understand. It is a must to remember that things can only have an effect on us if we allow it. Other people’s reactions and perceptions of us are not our problem, it is a reflection of who they are. However, the moment you allow their reaction to become your problem, that is a reflection of how you see yourself.

One of the hardest things to realize is that the things that happen in our life many times are our own mirror. For your well-being, no matter how hard the inner work may be, it is a must to assess your own role in attracting the kinds of situations and people that you attract and assess how you see and view yourself. This is just one of the many things that hurtful situations can provide to us- the opportunity for greater growth. Don’t deny yourself of the opportunity of greater growth just because the pain seems so much to handle.

I love the story of how pearls are made because, believe it or not, pearls come from something that irritated the oyster. The oyster must remain open if it is to live but in the process, it is vulnerable to things that may hurt it or irritate it like a grain of sand. In order for the oyster not to allow that grain of sand to irritate it, it covers it with layers of nacre, which then forms the pearl. That’s exactly what can happen in our life- we can create pearls from the very things that hurt us.

I would like to encourage you in today’s post to make pearls out of your hurtful situations. Don’t let it make you bitter, resentful nor hateful. All these emotions are just poison for you. You are worth much more than that! What others do, let it be a lesson for you. Make it into a pearl and learn to be grateful for that hurtful situation.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.
You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.
Also, should you want a healthy way of dealing with the everyday things that we tend to go through in life, you are more than welcome to contact me so that I can also show you how essential oils can help you and your family have a healthier life. You are more than welcome to visit my store at http://my.doterra.com/AuraEMartinez. I will soon be having online courses on different topics in regards to essential oils.

To What Degree Is Vulnerability Not Good?

What makes me address this topic of vulnerability are two things: 1. as human beings it’s only normal and human to be vulnerable. Vulnerability is what makes us human, what can humble us and we can actually grow from our vulnerabilities. 2. I read an article that was a bit disturbing about someone who I will not mention the name but the fact that some people have mentioned how she uses other people’s vulnerability to exploit them just saddens. Although being vulnerable is only human, there is a certain degree of vulnerability that is not good and it is this kind of vulnerability that I would like to discuss in today’s blog post.

Many may want to hide their vulnerability and that’s understandable. I don’t think anyone wants others to think that they are weak or anything negative of that sort. I would like to make emphasis once again that there is nothing wrong with being and feeling vulnerable because that is what makes us human. It also doesn’t make you a weak person. However, like anything, too much is the same as too little. Being and feeling too vulnerable to the degree that look outside of yourself so much to the point that you don’t look within can be very dangerous territory to tread.

I looked up two places for the definition of vulnerability. On Google, the definition was “the quality or state of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed, either physically or emotionally”. On the Cambridge English dictionary, the definition was “able to be easily hurt, influenced, or attacked”. There is a point I want to prove with these two definitions. If you are “exposed emotionally” in terms of you feeling hurt because you are grieving or you went through some trauma or you feel depressed at the moment or anxious, any of the things that human beings go through, in this case, there is nothing wrong with being vulnerable because it takes courage to be vulnerable and come out of all that stronger. However, if you are “able to be easily hurt, influenced, or attacked”, then vulnerability is a problem.

I also would like to discuss the part of the first definition of vulnerability “….being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed…”. I think the word itself has had a bad reputation, for lack of a better word, because it is when someone is vulnerable when they can “feel” or “think” they are defenseless. I would like to encourage you to believe that vulnerability does not mean powerless. Vulnerability can take you to greater heights in being able to understand others in a way that some perhaps may not. You will only be defenseless if that’s what you believe and if you give your power away just because life threw something at you that you were not prepare for.

Now on to the kind of vulnerability that is not good. Vulnerability is not good when that puts you in a position where you no longer validate yourself. When you need others to validate you constantly because you feel powerless, that’s a problem. Trauma, childhood issues, abuse, depression, anxiety, none of this need to make you powerless. You are a beautiful being, made to perfection even with your imperfections and made with a purpose.

Vulnerability is not good when you give someone the power to make the decisions for you, to tell you what is right for you or anything of that sort. YOU have the power to make your own right decisions. YOU are the only one who truly knows what is right for you. Others can help lead you to your own path and help you figure it out on your own but if you need someone else to lead you rather than you lead yourself, this kind of vulnerability is not good.

Vulnerability is not good when you allow mistreatment from others. When you are not aware of other people’s mistreatment because you are too “vulnerable” to realize this, this is a major problem. Yes, as human beings we need love, to be needed and to belong but it should never be at the price of our self-esteem. It’s too expensive to lose your peace of mind, dignity and self-love.

Vulnerability…..it’s one of those topics that must be discussed since it affects our well-being but we determine how we let it affect us. It can affect us in a positive way if we allow ourselves to grow from the experience or it can affect us in a negative way, allowing it to rob our self-worth, our power and our connection with ourselves.

This is my longest blog post yet and it was because of that disturbing article I read that I needed to address this topic. If you are feeling vulnerable at this moment, I would like to please encourage you to utilize your vulnerability for growth, not for self-destruction. It’s necessary for “bad” things to happen because we can grow from it and be better because of it. Of course, I quote the word bad because this word can mean different things for different people. It is with the intention of helping you view vulnerability in a lighter light that I write this blog post.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

The Grass Is Never Greener On the Other Side

I think as human beings it’s only normal to think that perhaps others have it better than us, that perhaps we can find someone better than the one we are currently seeing, etc. This kind of thinking although it may be natural to feel, it can prevent you from seeing all the good that is front of you. It is because of this that I would like to encourage you to see that the grass is never greener on the other side.

Don’t wait until something is lost for you to start valuing it. Remember that you currently have things that others would like to have. That may be the job that you have someone else may want. That can also be the relationship that you are currently in someone else would like to have a relationship like yours. Perhaps even a physical quality of yours someone else may want to have. Whatever it is, remember that you have something that someone else may want.

Also, your grass is as green as you make it. Perhaps other people’s grass looks greener because they are taking care of their own grass. So with this said, start taking care of what you currently have. Whatever it is that you see others have, why don’t you try your best to have that as well but just in a way that it’s unique to you. Start taking the steps necessary so that you can have the things that you want, the life that you want, the relationships that you want, the job that you want, etc.

I would like to encourage you to start seeing the wonderful things that you have in your life. Ask yourself: What can I be grateful for today? What do I have that is just great? What are some things about myself that are amazing? How can I improve the relationship I’m currently in? What are the aspects of this relationship that I love? What are some things that make my job great?

Asking yourself these questions will get your brain thinking and moving toward a more positive direction. Remember that your grass will be as green as you make it to be. Do your best to tend to your grass. Take care of it in every season so that it can look its best. Remember that in every aspect of your life, what you put in is what you get out. If you want your life to be as great as you want it to be, that is up to you to do the work that it takes. You have the power to make your grass as green as you want it to be and remember that just because other people’s grass is very green, doesn’t mean that it is greater and better than yours.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

Nothing Belongs to You

“What in the world Aura?! Nothing belongs to me?! What kind of a post is this when it comes to my well-being?!” you may wonder. Well, in today’s post, I want to give you a perspective that can make you stronger and even a healthier person because indeed nothing belongs to you.

It’s sad to lose. It’s sad to lose a parent, a child, a spouse, a relationship, a job, anything, you name it. The reason why these things hurt is because of the meaning that they have for us or the meaning we have attached to it. However, if you can adopt the mindset and the knowing that nothing belongs to you, then nothing will hurt so much to the point of extreme pain.

One thing I want to clarify is that with this post, I am not encouraging coldness. I am not encouraging isolation nor lack of attachment to people or things. Belonging and relationships are what add meaning to our life. But it is the healthy belonging and healthy relationships what add meaning to our life. Unhealthy attachments to anything only leads to misery and lack of well-being.

Nothing belongs to you in the sense that nothing is truly your property- not a spouse, not a parent, not a job, not a child, nothing. Your true property is your body- your brain and your life. When you understand this with your mind and soul, letting go of things can be a bit easier. It is not easy to let go of things or people you care about, but when you can remember that nothing belongs to you, you know that things can go at any time.

Nothing belongs to you frees you from having to prove yourself to others. All you are supposed to be is your best self and when this is who you are, then those who are supposed to be in your life will be in your life. There needs to be a balance to things and although you are responsible, say for example, for the relationship that you have with your spouse, you can’t be something that you are not to please him or her. So this concept of “nothing belongs to you” frees you to just be yourself without any worries.

Nothing belongs to you makes you less attached which makes you less of a slave. That’s right! Strong attachments can make us a slave- a slave of hurt, a slave of the past, a slave of dependence, a slave to misery, etc. The best freedom to have is the freedom to be who you are truly meant to be which is a joyful, healthy person. In order to be this joyful, healthy person, you can’t have strong attachments to anything.

Nothing belongs to you frees you to happiness because it is then when your happiness isn’t dependent on someone else’s actions or lack of action, a situation, etc. When nothing belongs to you, all you care about is what you have control over which are your reaction to things, your emotions, your thoughts and your actions. That’s it.

The “nothing belongs to you” notion is a must to increase in well-being. This is not about being cold, not having any attachments or not caring. On the contrary, this is about having healthy attachments and about love- love towards yourself AND others. Yes, this is even about loving others because loving others is about freeing them to make their own choices even when we don’t like the choices they make. Loving others is about allowing others to be as they please even when it doesn’t please us. Loving others is also about losing them even when it hurts.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

How Hungry Are You?

Hunger….is something that we try to suppress because let’s face it, hunger is uncomfortable. No, I’m not referring to physical hunger. I’m referring to the hunger that you have to improve your life and well-being.

I constantly hear people saying that they want a better life but yet if you ask them “what are you doing to have the life you want?”, they say nothing. I have said over and over again, it’s not enough to just want, you have to be HUNGRY. So I would like to ask you now, how hungry are you?

How hungry are you to lose weight? If you are not doing anything to change your diet and lifestyle, then you are not truly wanting to lose weight. How hungry are you to change your financial situation? If you’re not doing anything viable to start changing your financial situation, then you truly don’t want to change it. How hungry are you to make your dreams come true? If you are not taking the first step to get to where you want to go, then you truly don’t want that dream to come true.

It is a must to face your fears. Fear is a part of life but it doesn’t have to stop you! Things will be challenging but it’s all part of the bigger picture. Also I want to encourage you not to compare your first step with other people’s first step. The reason for this is because everyone is in a different journey in life. Everyone’s path will be different no matter how similar it may be.

I learned to embrace hunger. Hunger creates pain so I encourage you to feel that pain. Feel it until the continue feeling of that pain is greater than the fear you may feel. That is what will help you do what you must do in order to have the life that you want.

Once again, and I mean it with all my heart, wanting is not enough in life no matter what you may want. You need to have hunger. Hunger is a must because hunger pushes you to do what you must do in order to satisfy that hunger. So don’t suppress the hunger. Feel it until it seriously hurts then do something to change the situation.

So if you want the things you want but are not doing anything serious about it, ask yourself how hungry are you. The lack of action is an indicator that the hunger is not there. It takes being hungry to take the action necessary to have the life and well-being that you want. Embrace that hunger until it hurts and then go do something about that hunger!

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

 

“It Will All Somehow Get Done”

These past few weeks have been extremely stressful. The last time I’ve been so stressed was when my dad was very ill but this stress, which was brought upon goals that I had set for myself, was certainly not a healthy one. It brought acne to my face, so much that I haven’t seen in a long time, and a body breakdown last week Friday which led to me being in bed all day. I constantly heard a low voice telling me “It will all somehow get done” and had I listened to this inner voice, I don’t think I would have reached that point of stress. It is this that I would like to encourage you in today’s post….no matter what it is that you are trying to accomplish or need to finish doing…it will all somehow get done.

It will all somehow get done, therefore, there is no point in stressing. For what? To stress your body unnecessarily? Raise your blood pressure unnecessarily? Get yourself all out of whack mentally? It doesn’t matter how many goals you have, nothing is more precious than your body so it is a must to relax in the thought that everything will resolve itself.

It will all somehow get done, therefore there is no point in worrying. Worrying is so energy consuming to the point that it paralyzes you. It is actually a low energy vibration so this certainly won’t get you to where you want to go. Worrying robs you of mental and emotional agility, which you need when you have a lot going on.

It will all somehow get done…if you always keep this phrase in your mind, this will help you decrease any negative emotion you may feel due to the overwhelming pressures you may have. As long as you focus on the end result, whatever it is that you want to do, you will see the results of your labor.

It will somehow get done….a powerful phrase, believe it or not, and a way to train your mind and body to not stress itself because of life’s pressure. You were not meant to be stressed to the point of being sick. Enjoy everything you have to do, even the things that are not so pleasant- they are all part of the journey of growing into the person that you are meant to be.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

The Importance of Saying “No”

You probably wouldn’t think that this has much to do with your well-being, however, “no” should be a part of your vocabulary in order to increase your well-being and this is what I will be discussing in this week’s post.

There is a Spanish saying that goes “Quien mucho abarca, poco aprieta” which means that if you try to get your arms around too much, you won’t be able to squeeze. In other words, if you try to do so much, you will get none done. There is only so much that anyone can do and the more you want, not only do you have to take breaks and stop for a moment, you have to say “no” to some things that can come your way.

Stress should be reserve for real emergencies- when a family member is ill, when you are ill, when there is an accident, etc.- not for every day stuff of life. Stressing because you are taking up on so much will only lead to illness and to frustration. It will take you out of alignment and won’t help you think straight.

I’ve written this before and I’ll write it again, it’s great to have goals, it’s great to want so much out of life. However, you don’t ever want to take yourself to the point where you break down. That does no good to anyone.

Saying “no” is about setting priorities. In order to achieve much, you need to set priorities first and then once those tasks are completed, move on to the next task. It’s not that certain things are not important to you, it’s just that in order for you to be able to complete that other project successfully, you first must complete the one you have at hand. Also, you must know what would make the most difference now and work on that first. This is another way to get more done- knowing what would make the most difference in your life if that task was completed.

Saying “no” is about setting your own boundaries. You set boundaries for yourself and for others. Your well-being must be a priority, first and foremost, and so when you say “no” to certain things, you are avoiding getting yourself into things that at the end will just drive you mentally crazy because it’s too much to do and physically exhausted because having so much to do does wear the body down.

Make saying “no” a part of your vocabulary. This is about you taking care of yourself, not taking on too much stuff than you can possibly handle at the moment and setting boundaries. Others may have their opinions in regards to your “no” and that’s ok. At the end of the day, it’s how you feel that matters most and you never want to take yourself to the point of a breakdown.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

The Positive and Negative of Everything

I’ve been pondering and asking myself why for many great things there has to be a negative to it. I’m working out this morning and although I love to workout and I’m helping my health with that, my hair has to be a nice mess afterwards. It makes me feel as if I have to choose between my body or my hair. Same thing with other decisions that I have to make, there are positives and negatives to everything. It makes me wonder why this is and this is what today’s post will be about.

I think one of the best comparisons to describe how life functions is a battery- it has a positive and a negative side. The battery, in order to function the way it is supposed to, needs both sides. If both sides are positive or negative, it just can’t work right. For as much as we would like for life to just have the positive, it can’t function if there is no negative.

So what’s the purpose of having both in our life? They both help balance each other out. This goes with everything in life. You can’t understand what true happiness is unless you know what sadness is. You can’t fully comprehend what true abundance is until you experience lack. You don’t fully appreciate your body until you get sick. You don’t fully appreciate the role someone plays in your life until you miss them. Certain places have to have their own downside because otherwise if it were to suite everyone, there would be a problem whether that problem is a place being overpopulated or very stressful, etc. This is what having the good and the bad can do, it can balance things out.

Balance is what contributes to your well-being and this is key. You need both sides in order to balance out your life. It is through balance that things can work in harmony. Nature intended it to be that way.

Having the negative along with the positive can bring out the creative side in us. This is because the negative can make you look for solutions as to how to a handle a situation. For example, I have to be creative with my hair in order to make it look nice after I workout. Certain things force the creative side of you and that is great.

So, if nature intended it this way, how can one handle the positives and the negatives when making certain decisions? When it comes to making decisions, you have to see what weighs more for you. It’s a matter of knowing who you are and knowing what matters most to you.

When it comes to cases where the negatives of something highly impacts your well-being, if it’s a decision that you made to have that positive in your life but it comes at a high price, then you have to mold yourself to the negative. What I mean with this is to find a way to work around the negative. For instance, if it’s a job that affects your health due to odd hours of work, then create your life and make a schedule that can still fit your job. The point is that you want to work with what you have and make the most of it.

Life indeed is like a battery with its positive and negative sides and both are needed in order for things to work in harmony. Both sides are needed in order to have balance in life. I encourage you to start looking at everything from this perspective.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Know Your Limits and Respect Them

Last week and this week, so far, have been challenging weeks between flying a lot and finalizing my manuscript which I must say, I have high respect for editors because editing your own work even after your work has been edited is not easy. It can be challenging juggling many things at once. It is great to have many goals and if I were to list the ones I have at this moment, you would agree that they are a lot. The exhaustion I felt, my eyeballs hurting from all the reading as well as feeling stressed leads me to writing this post- it is important to know your limits and respect them.

No matter how many goals you may have, know that even though the sky indeed is the limit, because you are only human you have certain limits and it is important to respect them. It’s possible to achieve so much, it’s possible to get many things done but not all at once.

Remember that the more you want and do, the more you need to pause, relax, and have breaks. This is not about being lazy, not at all. This is about you not burning out. If you allow stress to get to you, in the end you will be no good. It is important to remember that no matter how many things you want to accomplish, you can only do what you can do and you still need to be proud of yourself for that.

We all have certain limits and this is because we are only humans, not machines. Even machines if they are pushed to the limit they break down. We all have certain limits because of time since we only have 24 hours in a day. We all have certain limits because of our body in the sense that you never want to push your body too far. The best way to not get burned out, not get yourself sick and not be overwhelmed is by knowing your limits and respecting them.

Your body will tell you when you are reaching your limit. If you feel terribly exhausted or even sick, you know you have reached your limit. If you are starting to feel angry and irritable, you are reaching your limit. If you are no longer enjoying what you are doing, you are reaching your limit. You will receive feedback when you are reaching your limit.

You respect your limits by mentally reminding yourself that you are doing the best you can. By still giving yourself a pat on the back for what you have accomplished during the day. You do this by taking breaks when needed and not being so hard on yourself when you didn’t accomplish a certain thing you wanted to accomplish that day. You respect your body when it is tired and give your body all it needs in order to keep itself strong. Remember that your body is your primary vehicle and if that isn’t working, nothing will work. Rome was not built in one day and so whatever it is that you are wanting to do will take time. You will always be a work in progress.

So far I respected my limits by sleeping as much as I needed since my sleep was a bit compromised. Since I enjoy cooking, I made myself some delicious meals. I remind myself that I am doing the best that I can even if I am unable to keep up with some of the things that I had in mind to do, like blog last week. I had to remind myself that I am only human and as such, I am not perfect and that’s ok. It’s ok not to be perfect and not doing things exactly as I said to myself that I would. This is the same that I encourage you to do.

Knowing your limits and respecting them is a must for your well-being. If you try to be superman or superwoman, you will find yourself all burned out real quick. It’s best to be like the tortoise and be slow but steady. That’s how you get further in life. This doesn’t mean laziness, let me clarify, this just means that you don’t burn yourself out trying to do so much all at once.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.