I’ve written about many topics when it comes to well-being. I had an interesting conversation last week that left me thinking about this very question “Does the goods justify the arrogance?”. Where did this conversation come from? It came from the fact that someone mentioned that a specific person had the right to be arrogant because that person had the goods to back it up. I couldn’t disagree more and as you keep reading, you will understand how this affects your well-being.
One thing I must say is that there is nothing wrong with giving credit where credit is due. If a person acquires a particular skill that can be hard to master, good for them. If a person has a specific talent, good for them. If a person has several degrees, good for them. If a person is physically gorgeous, good for them. However, no amount of “goods” ever justifies being arrogant. For the sake of this post, when I refer to “goods”, this means any skill, any talent, any attribute that for many are very appealing.
How does this tie with well-being? For starters, we are wired to be connected with others. We are wired to feel love and give love. There is no way to connect with others through arrogance. There is no way you are giving love through that stance. Also, on the contrary to what many may think, arrogance is not a sign of self-esteem or of confidence, it’s actually the opposite. It is a sign of weakness, of insecurity. The truly secure person has no need to think they are better than others. The truly secure person has no need to look nor treat others as inferior. Everyone has their own talents and beauties and those are to be embraced, not thought of as inferior because they may not be as “great” as someone else’s. Arrogance is disconnection. Arrogance divides. Well-being is connection, it is togetherness. It is great to form connections with others from a point of you appreciating what they have and know even if it’s different from what you have and know.
There is no advantage to being arrogant. It just shows that you feel inferior, not superior and it is a sign of weakness. No goods justify the arrogance no matter what that good is. In the end, what you do with that arrogance is you distance pearls away from you.
You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.
Detachment, I think it’s a word worth exploring and writing about when it comes to your well-being. This may seem the opposite of what you need in life since part of what gives life meaning is the connections and attachments that we have to certain things but whether you recognize this or not, there is a certain level of detachment that we must have for things and people if we are to be mentally and emotionally sane and this is what this post will be about.
The art of detachment is a very important one for your well-being because by detaching yourself from things and people, you are relying upon yourself for your own happiness and to create the life you want. By no means do I mean that you will not create bonds with others or that you will isolate yourself from others or that you will not have any form of feelings towards things or others, not at all! We all need to feel a certain level of attachment and connection to things and people since we are all social beings. However, with this said, the kind of true attachment that you must have is the one with yourself. If you can master having a strong attachment with yourself, you will develop a healthy bond and attachment to others without it compromising your well-being. When you can master this attachment, then the kind of detachment that I am referring to will be easy for you.
The kind of detachment that I am referring to is the kind where despite the fact that you may care about something or someone, you are able to separate your identity from that object or person. It is the kind of detachment where your happiness is not dependent upon what that person does or doesn’t do nor what happens or doesn’t happen. It is not dependent upon whether or not that person or thing exists in your life. The kind of detachment that I am referring to is the kind where your attachment to that object or person is not as strong as the one that you have for yourself.
Why is this kind of detachment important to your well-being? Because it is very dangerous to rely upon a circumstance or person for your happiness. It is dangerous to wait till someone does something or till something happens in order to be happy. By doing so, you are putting your life on hold, you become a burden to others rather than a blessing, you stop yourself from being your full self and you are not able to serve yourself nor others.
Detachment doesn’t have to be a bad thing, it is indeed a necessity to your well-being. What doesn’t serve you is to be completely detached to the point where you have no real feelings towards things or other people. What doesn’t serve you is to have superficial relationships just so you won’t be hurt. No, this is NOT life nor does it help create that great well-being that you need. It is important to create healthy bonds with others but that bond doesn’t have to be what your happiness is based upon. Yes, you need to have healthy attachment to things but it does not have to be THE thing that gives you all your happiness. This is where that art of detachment comes into play. The one attachment that should be so strong no matter what happens in your life is that attachment towards yourself. This is where your true happiness lies.
You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.