What Determines the Choices That We Make?

Last week I wrote about how it all comes down to our choices but what is it that determines the choices that we make? Well, that’s what I would like to write about in today’s post.

There are many factors that influence the choices that we make. Two big ones are our feelings and our mind frame at the time that we make our choices. We are emotional beings and as emotional beings, we are highly influenced by how we feel and that plays a big role in the decisions that we make. When you feel down, needy, or you are coming from a place of emptiness, of course you won’t make the right choices. When you are tired or stressed, you are most likely to choose foods that are sugary or the bad carbs. When you feel lonely and needy or don’t feel so good about yourself, you are most likely to choose people that are no good for you. Likewise, when you feel good and relaxed, you are most likely to choose healthy foods. When you feel good about yourself and feel a sense of fullness, you are most likely to choose people that are good for you. This is the power of emotions.

Your mind frame also plays a huge role in the choices that you make. The wrong mindset can attract even your worst nightmare. It will feel as if you are a magnet for bad things and in essence, when your mindset is wrong for you, indeed you do attract the wrong things. It’s not that you necessarily attract it, but it is as if you can not filter what is bad for you. When your mindset is not right, of course your emotions won’t be right. Everything is connected, therefore, where your thoughts are, your emotions will follow as well. The wrong mindset can lead you to thinking that what you would like is not possible, leading you to make the wrong choices. However, when your mindset is right, you will find yourself looking at the possibilities of things no matter how hard something may seem.

When making a decision, it is important to understand your reason behind that decision and the consequences of that decision. Everything has consequences whether they are good or bad. Consequences are nothing more than the results that we get from every action we take.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

It All Comes Down To Your Choices

I found it interesting that someone came across my blog by typing “I woke up feeling sad, what does this mean” in their search. Whoever it was that typed this and came across my blog, first I would like to thank you for reading my blog and I hope that today’s post can shine a light to what it is that you are searching.

I do believe that there are reasons for our emotions. Whether we understand that emotion or not, that is a different story and a different topic that I can discuss another time. The reason why I find it so essential for me to write today’s post is because perhaps many feel things that they may not understand and are trying to understand the “why”.

When feeling down, it is important to understand why you feel down and it is even more important for you to know that it all comes down to your choices. You make the choice everyday as to how you are going to feel about things, how you are going to let things affect you and you are the one who chooses whether or not you are going to live a happy life. You do have control over your life in many ways whether you realize this or not.

When you feel sad, you should ask yourself why is that and make the decision to be happy. Make that decision that you will have that life that you always wanted. Make that decision to have a healthy life. Make that decision to surround yourself by loving and supportive people. Make that decision to be the best you that you can be. Know that your emotions are a part of you but they don’t have to rule you. I would like to clarify that I am not saying to ignore your emotions or that you just force yourself to feel happy when feeling sad, no, not at all. I would like to say that if you constantly feel sad for no reason for more than two weeks, I recommend you seek professional help. There is nothing wrong with seeking professional help when you need it. But know that you do have control over your life.

When a situation or a person “makes” you feel a certain way, know that the choice is yours as to how you are going to allow that person or situation to make you feel. The one in control of your emotions is YOU. No one and nothing else.

If there is a situation that just doesn’t make you happy, the choice is yours as to whether or not you will continue in that same situation. You have two choices- you either change the situation or you change your perspective of the situation. Staying miserable in the same situation shouldn’t be a choice and once again, the choice is always yours.

Everything from what we eat, the friends we have, the person we marry, the way we live, the way we think and everything in between are choices that we all make on a daily basis that impact our life even if it’s in small ways. You always have to remember no matter what, it all comes down to your choices.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

You Can Only Control Your Choices…

There are times where one may wish to control what someone else does or thinks. This can most certainly apply when it comes to something or someone that we really want or like or even care about. Whether it is someone that you have romantic feelings for, an action that you wish a loved one would make or any business decision someone else has to make, you can only control the choices that YOU make.

How can having this simple fact ingrained in you help you with your well-being? Well, I learned the hard way that unless I let go of the fact that I can not control how others will react nor what choices they will make, I will never be happy. It’s as simple as that. I know so well that this is easier said than done, trust me I know and I have been so hardheaded for so long to realize this. The truth is that when you realize that you can not control other people’s choices other than your own, you become a much happier person.

Understanding with your mind and your heart this simple fact will help you relinquish control of how things in your life goes. You will feel how that sense of heaviness gets lifted from you because indeed you are letting go of something that you have no business carrying around with you. When you carry around the burden of wanting to control what goes on around you and what others do, you are carrying an unnecessary baggage that just holds you back in life. Sometimes to enjoy life, this requires that you just let go of how others will react or what choices they will make with regards to things. With this I am by no means writing that you shouldn’t care about what others do or say or anything along these lines. What I am encouraging is that you don’t try to control what others do or think in regards to any situation that may involve you. For example, when it comes to love (I mention love here because this is a touching subject for most of us), you only have control over how you feel and react. For as much as you may care about the other person, for as much as you may want to be with that person, for as much as you may want to work things out or want the other person to see the value in you, unfortunately you don’t have total control over this. All you can do is just be your best you and let go of the outcome.

One of the main reasons why it is important for you to know that you can only control your choices and not other people’s choices is because this helps you let go of the outcome. In other words, you don’t get so attached to the outcome of whatever situation. This helps you greatly not to take things personal, not to be so hurt by what happened and you are actually freeing yourself. Part of well-being is having a sense of freedom and freedom goes beyond the financial aspect, (I can discuss this on another post).

For now, I encourage you for your well-being, in order to spare yourself from more hurt, headaches, heartaches, disappointments, remember that you can only control your choices.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

The Kinds of People You Need In Your Life

Only you know what is best for you and you know the kinds of people that you need in your life. This is because each and everyone of us are different and unique. Your needs will be different from others, your personality is different and so on and so this is why you know what is best for you and the kinds of people that you need in your life. However, there are certain kinds of people that we ALL need and this is so essential for our well being. These kinds of people are people who are mentally, emotionally and spiritually healthy (which I will explain more about this), people who love themselves, people who are comfortable with who they are and who have genuine goodness within them.

You don’t need people who are psychopaths, who are obsessive, who don’t have healthy boundaries, who don’t love themselves, who are envious because these kinds of people don’t have much to offer to you. Psychopaths, well, these people are all about sucking your energy and you don’t need that. People who are obsessive, they have certain ideas about you in relation to them that are just not healthy for you. Those who don’t have healthy boundaries, well, this can be a topic all on its own but not having healthy boundaries lead to unhealthy relationships. Those who don’t love themselves, they just don’t have the capacity to love others in a healthy way (this too could be a topic all on its own). Those who are envious just have negative energy to offer to you and they have issues of their own to resolve that you just can’t help them with.

Why am I writing all this? I’m writing this because the people who you surround yourself with play a huge role on your well-being. We are social beings and as social beings we do have a need to interact with others and to have a sense of community. However this need should not make you choose people who drain your energy, who rob you of your self-esteem, who make you feel wrong in any way, etc. We are all energy and it is for this reason that you want to make sure that you choose people who already have a healthy relationship with themselves, who already love themselves, who are genuinely good. Choosing people who are mentally, emotionally and spiritually healthy is so crucial to one’s health. When someone is mentally healthy, they have a healthy perspective in terms of their relation to you. So there is no room for this person to be possessive or obsessive. When someone is emotionally healthy, they feel so good about themselves despite any complex they may have and when they see someone who has a quality that they feel they lack, rather than being envious, they have admiration and respect. Someone who is spiritually healthy is always cultivating themselves, making sure that they attend to their needs and don’t place that responsibility onto someone else.

There are many factors that can contribute to someone feeling like their life is out of balance and I believe this is one of the many factors. The choice is yours to choose people who are healthy for you. Make sure that you choose people who love themselves. Make sure that you choose people with healthy boundaries. Make sure that you choose people who are mentally, emotionally and spiritually healthy. Your well-being depends on this.

You can also read this blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.